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Right from the very first session, I emphasise that sexual problems are more common than people think.

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It’s the body saying, ‘I am under severe threat, so the best way for me to survive here might be to be lubricated.

That way it will hurt less, and it will get us through this ordeal more quickly.’ I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen the shame lifting from someone’s body when I explain that to them—it comes as such a relief.

That can result in them putting themselves at risk sexually, because they don’t believe that they are worth protecting.

They see the body not as a temple but more of a vessel, and a contaminated one at that.

Once people understand their triggers and behaviours, they are more likely to allow a change, if that’s what they want.